Domestic and financial abuse

Domestic abuse is a serious and often hidden issue that affects people from all ages and backgrounds. If you or someone you know is experiencing domestic abuse, it’s important to know that help is available. You’re not alone, and there are resources and support systems ready to help you. This section offers information on recognising the signs of abuse and finding safe ways to seek help.

  • What is domestic abuse?

    Domestic abuse is when someone you know controls, threatens, hurts or scares you. This can happen once or many times. It can happen at home or in a close relationship.

    Anyone can face domestic abuse at any time in their life. It’s often caused by a partner or ex-partner, but it can also come from a family member, carer, friend, or colleague.

    Domestic abuse isn’t always physical violence. It includes different types of harm, such as controlling behaviour, emotional abuse, and financial control. These may be harder to notice but can be just as harmful.

  • Types of domestic abuse

    Coercive control – This is when someone uses fear, threats or force to control you. They may stop you from seeing friends or family. They may watch what you do or set rules to embarrass you and limit your ability to make your own decisions.

    Emotional and psychological abuse – This happens when someone insults you, frightens you or humiliates you. They might use techniques like stopping you from sleeping which impacts your mental and physical wellbeing, or turn others against you. “Gaslighting” is when they make you doubt your own thoughts or memories.

    Financial abuse – This is when someone controls your money. They might steal from you or force you into debt.

    Economic abuse – This happens when someone stops you from earning money or limits what you can spend. They might refuse to share costs for food, bills, or housing. They may also control your transport, property or basic needs.

    Abuse often happens in multiple forms at once. Financial and economic abuse can make it difficult for someone to leave an abusive relationship.

  • Do any of these sound familiar?

    Here are some examples of financial and domestic abuse. This can help you identify if you or someone you know is experiencing some type of abuse.

    “My ex-partner refuses to sign anything that will help lower my mortgage payments, even though they are no longer paying the mortgage.”

    “My partner forced me to take out a loan and put the money in their account.”

    “My family make me give them my wages every month. I never get to spend anything on myself.”

    “I was made to give all my money to my partner to support their addiction.”

    “My family sold some of my belongings without me knowing.”

    “My partner won’t allow me to work, they insist I stay at home.”

    “A person I met online is asking me for money.”

  • What help is available to me?

    We are trained to help you if you think you are suffering from any type of abuse. Any conversation you have with us will be confidential, and we’ll do everything we can to help.

    We’ll listen to you and review how we can support you. Once we understand your situation, we can make sure your account and personal information is kept safe.

    You can call us on 0345 300 8000* or fill in our online support form. We’ll make sure all your information is kept private and secure.

    Here are some examples of what we can do to help your situation:

    • Separate joint accounts (subject to criteria)
    • Send your letters to a safe address
    • Reset your hub account password
    • Give you information on accounts you hold with us
    • Speak to a trusted third party on your behalf
  • What other support is available?

    There are many organisations that can help you.

    • Surviving Economic Abuse can provide resources and support if you’ve been affected by economic abuse, helping you regain financial control.
    • Refuge offers support and shelter to women and children experiencing domestic violence, including a 24-hour helpline.
    • Women’s Aid supports women and children facing domestic abuse with a range of resources, including advice, local services, and advocacy.
    • ManKind Initiative provides support to male victims of domestic abuse, offering confidential advice and assistance.
    • Men’s Advice Line is a helpline for men experiencing domestic abuse, offering emotional support and guidance.
    • National LGBT+ Domestic Abuse Helpline offers specialised support for LGBT+ individuals facing domestic abuse, with a safe and understanding approach.
    • GOV.UK offers legal advice with separation of assets.

    You can also read UK Finance’s It’s Your Money guide. It explains how financial services, like ourselves, can support you if you have experienced economic or financial abuse. There’s also a printable pocket size version available.

* Visit our accessibility support page to call using a British Sign Language (BSL) interpreter. To call using text Relay, dial 18001 then the number you want to call using a textphone or the Relay UK app. All calls are recorded for training and monitoring purposes. Lines are open 9am – 5pm, Monday to Friday. We’re closed on Bank Holidays. 03 calls cost no more than calls to geographic numbers (01 or 02). Calls from landlines and mobiles are included in free call packages.